Tuesday, December 3, 2013

state of the nation

i've been such a bad blogger!  not a peep in weeks.  i don't know whether to blame the fall hibernation mode or that i've been busy.  a bit of both i guess.  it's such a cliche, but time is just flying by.  i think it helps that i've had stuff to do.  well, not "do" so much as "click around online at."  some of the stuff on my plate:

looking at getting a car.  my aunt is generously funding a new (used) car for me.  ugh, that sounds so privileged, doesn't it?  it's kind of funny, in a non-ha ha way, that i grew up within a pretty limited-budget household, but sometimes golden nuggets just kind of fall in my lap with no work or effort on my part.  (my current car was also donated to me, by aunt's husband, uncle, after his mother passed.)  but it doesn't boggle my mind if i think about it too hard, because that's not the level of lifestyle in which i was raised.  i was a kid with a single mom working on her PhD, living in student housing, shopping at kmart. we didn't have a lot, but there was money for the occasional treat.  (getting a happy meal was a treat. going to the local mexican restaurant on "kids eat free" wednesdays was a treat, "earning" a trapper-keeper by doing chores and being not-naughty was a treat.)  i couldn't put whatever i wanted in the grocery basket and i got home haircuts and never had a store-bought halloween costume. my mom drove a truck that was older than me (which i died during my sophmore year in college) and we never had a dishwasher.  not poor, really, but poor-ish in comparison with a good portion of families. (and very blessed in comparison to many others).  my mom, she must have been a phenomenal budgeter, because she was able to take me to disneyland (with cheap student tickets) and we saw the the ballet (in the balcony seats) and went to the movies (matinee, snuck in snacks).  so i did get to do a lot of stuff, but we weren't "in the money" by any means.  and to me, being given a car is on par with being taken on european vacations, going summer camp, i don't know what else.. having ponies?
i say that kind of with tongue-in-cheek, but it's important to me that when i say i'm being given a car that people realize that *i* realize how amazing it is and how grateful i am, and that it's not at all expected or a case of entitlement.

anyhow, in another lucky stroke, a family-in-law member manages a car place and it looks like he may have found one for me.  which is good because he'll check it out for me and if i can save my aunt some money too, i'd like to.

so there's been that going on.

i've also finally started to (somewhat) plan my wedding.  i have some ideas kicking around, but no solid plans yet.  neither mark or i want a traditional wedding, or even one with people invited.  (we're such nut-cases, i swear.)  i don't want people to show up and me have had an anxiety attack and canceled the thing, and he hates attention of any and all sorts. (and yet, he's a musician, go figure.)  so there's the "do we invite parents or no" debate and if we do it might be best to do it during my mom's pre-planned june visit. if mark can stand her and his parent's looking at him taking the vows.

i *have* bought a dress that i think i'm pretty happy with, and yesterday i bought the shoes i'd been eyeing. (both modcloth, which i had never purchased from before - see, i told you i'm not a real blogger.)   since my aunts won't be there i've purchased and re-styled some "sapphire" earrings into 4 necklaces, so they, my mom, and i can each have a "something-blue" matching wedding bauble and be "connected."  (that's a lot of quotes, sorry about that.)  i sort of looked at what mark might wear and where we might do the ceremony.  i even pinned some stuff!

i've been immersed in watching "vampire diaries," which is like, the best worst show ever and is constantly making me cry.  (to be fair, i teared up during "tinkerbell: secret of the wings.")  i just love me some attractive vampire angst, and is it me or has damon been amazing this season?  he needs a talk show or something.
well, i've come to the end of my thoughts for the night.  i need to clean up and shower because mark gets off early and we may have some time to cuddle in front of the fire (space heater) and watch some tv before i go to bed.

hope everyone out there had a good thanksgiving (and if i have the energy in a future post i might have some stuff to say about the state of our society re: the way we're so wrapped up in goods and services and how i think that's weird and cavemen would agree). 

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